Women Beware - by American Retiree in JamaicaPublished Oct 11, 2010
Women, be very careful with your relationship with men in Jamaica and this holds true also with men meeting women. Jamaica is a country that is known for its friendly people. They can be seen everywhere you go, from the airport when you first land, to the resorts where you spend most of your time, and even in the craft markets. This friendliness attracts women from all over the world especially from the young, handsome, and well built Jamaican men. But there is where the danger lies. The charm of these men has melted many a maiden’s heart causing them to walk down the aisle with these Casanovas thinking they can live out the perfect marriage for the rest of their lives.
I have learned through personal experience and feedback from my articles that too many women have fallen so hard for the lines of these men that they have blindly married what they thought was their knight in shining armor. However, it didn’t take long before the new brides realized the honeymoon was over in more ways than one. The most dramatic example I can share with you is one my wife and I were very much involved in. Marcy and Todd, not their real names, met in Jamaica while having breakfast in one of the tourist restaurants. The relationship started very quickly and continued to go so strongly that Marcy would fly to Jamaica almost monthly, sometimes just for a weekend, to see Todd. The more Marcy saw Todd the stronger her love for him grew. After several months of this long distance romance, they decided to get married. I should point out that she was thirteen years his senior. This didn’t seem to bother her because he knew how to make her very happy. He literally swept her off her feet.
The plans were made. Marcy quit her prestigious position with a major law firm and moved to Jamaica bringing with her several hundred thousand U.S. dollars. Together they built their dream home on property that Todd already owned with mostly her money. Marcy would be living in that home as a loving stay at home wife while Todd continued with his successful taxi operation at one of the hotels in Montego Bay. Then they bought a coaster bus which could hold about 40 passengers to be used as a daily bus service to and from Kingston. They also bought a top of the line Toyota Mark II for her to use. Each vehicle was purchased with her money.
Several months later, the relationship started to sour. Todd would call Marcy from the hotel frequently to tell her he had to take guests to Negril or some other strange story and would be very late coming home. Then the arguments would start between them. He was both physically and verbally abusive to her.
Shortly after we moved to Jamaica, my wife and I met Marcy for the first time at in an in-home wake for a friend of ours and Todd’s. The two women hit it off from the beginning and became good friends. My wife particularly liked Marcy as she was the only American woman she had met up to this time. But during one of their phone conversations, it was apparent that Todd was becoming very controlling of her life. So much so Marcy had to account for every minute of every day. Marcy would have to hang up quickly before Todd saw her on the phone or there would be even more questions. It wasn’t many days after that last phone call between my wife and Marcy that I received a phone call from the police saying Marcy had been murdered. The police called us as they couldn’t contact her two sisters in the states.
To make this long story short, Todd was charged and tried for Marcy’s murder, but was found not guilty partially because some of the jurors lived in the same community as Todd and were afraid of repercussions. Incidentally, Todd is now married to the girlfriend he had before and during his marriage with Marcy.
Another couple we know met in the U.S., but he got deported to Jamaica before they could get married. She, too, gave up everything she had and came to Jamaica to marry him. He also became abusive but she was able to move away from him before she became another victim like Marcy.
Two other women were forever sending money to Jamaica because their men said they needed cash for one emergency or another. It seems they were both of the men were always having some kind of cash emergency. One of the women came to Jamaica and married her man. She is very unhappy with her situation but doesn’t have the funds or family to help her move on. The other woman couldn’t make up her mind about moving to Jamaica. It seems sometimes they could get along and other times they couldn’t.
Some of the men try to marry foreign women as a ticket off the island. Sadly, most of them still wouldn’t be granted a visa. Others just want the money that they can milk off of these women. Then there are those macho men who are just on an ego trip so they can brag to their friends about their foreign conquests.
On the other foot I know of one Jamaican woman who tried very hard to get an English man to marry her so she could move to the U.K. with her fatherless children.
I can’t believe that these are the only war stories of love gone awry. That is why I am writing this article. Jamaican men have a bad reputation of being philanders. Some of them have several girlfriends and baby mothers on the side. I want every woman who comes to Jamaica to enjoy the talents of these smooth talking men to be very careful in getting too involved with them without stepping back and honestly evaluating the motives of these men. Please, don’t become another Stella trying to get your groove back. Later….
4 comment(s) on this page. Add your own comment below.
What a sad story about Marcy and Todd. Whenever I see those foreign women with Jamaican men on the beach in Montego Bay, I have to shake my head. One of my friends said, "They both know exactly what is going on." Apparently not always..
You are so right.Women do need to be careful . I fell in love with a jamaican man that I met on the internet. I fell for him before I even met him.I have been to Jamaica to see him and yes he was everything that I wanted and needed in a man and more. I plan to marry him soon.. With us we put all of our cards on the table, so that there is no miscommunication, or misunderstanding.It is what it is. We are truely in love with with each other..
This is a very good sory and reality a lot of women should read I hope to open their eyes!
I am a victim but woke up very fast, before I get into some I can't get out of and I don't want to end up dead! I wish, I could tell you my story and you could give me advise!
After spending many trips in Negril in the last couple years, I have seen many of these women in the same situation.