Alone, Scared and Betrayed - Memoirs Of An Illegal Alien Part 79 I was lonely. Sue was back in Jamaica. In the last few months before she left we had gotten very close. I think part of it was that we knew it would be a while before we would see each other again. The first week she left she called and we spoke for an hour the first month. It was cheaper for her to call from Jamaica than me calling her from Miami. She loved being back in Jamaica. My mother spoiled her rotten and her job at one of the investment & consulting firms was great. She and Kerri, our younger sister, were bonding again. They were making up for 5 years lost time.

Ms. Dulcie Sey: "Dem A Run De Parents!" Blessins to hall hof me loyal fans dem! Ow iz uno keepin dese pass few days? Well, me iz juss gettin me self togadder hafta dealin wid de Hingrid an de Yehuda bakkle, an hall dem mix-hup, mix-hup. Dem de two drain me so till, wid dem drama. Hanyway, tings seem to gawn bak to narmal. Hingrid and de pickney inna Hengland an ongly God knoes wey de Yehuda deh.....But dat's not my bizness, uno ketch mi drift....?

Live Broadcast: Usain Bolt And Belle Lubica Split - Reactions On The Streets (Satire) Just six months into their relationship, there are reports that Usain Bolt, and Slovakian fashion designer Lubica Slovak, has ended. With the new turn of events, Boardlane TV took the streets once again to obtain reaction from the Jamaican people.

Settling In: What Is For You - Part 5 This story tells the tale of Nadiya Foster, a Jamaican-born Canadian-bred university student who heads back to Jamaica for a one-year exchange program at UWI

Granny Knows Best Granny Gheeta was a woman of many talents, however,  her most famous talents included being dutiful Grandmother and Soothsayer. Perhaps it was her reverence and devotion to God that gave her the ability to forecast the future, because when it came to advice, Granny always seemed to have tremendous foresight regarding people, places and circumstances.

Graduation, Goodbye…The Flirting Game - Memoirs Of An Illegal Alien Part 78 It was time to break it off with Elena. She was getting too controlling and also very “kinky”. I am all for trying new things but she wanted to go into a new area that no God fearing Jamaican man would do. She wanted us to role play.

Ms. Dulcie Sey: "Dem A Look Far Color?!!!!" Greetins mi lovely fans....Ow iz uno doing dese fine days? Uno gettin ready far Jamaica's 50th Hindependence Celebrecion? A ow...! Ms. Dulcie a get wan pretty frock mek from Ms. Alewecious dung ina Spanish Town...

Live Broadcast: Asafa Powell Speaks: Reaction to Yendi’s Pregnancy (Satire) Good day to our Boardlane TV viewers, we apologize for breaking into today’s scheduled programming to bring you an impromptu press conference called by Asafa Powell. The Jamaican sprinter has felt the need to respond to the frenzy created by Yendi Philips’ announcement that she is now carrying Daniel 'Chino' McGregor’s child. We are at the Pegasus hotel where various TV, Radio and Newspaper media are at the conference questioning Mister Powell.

Granny Gheeta Talks About Surrounding Yourself With Positive People Granny Gheeta was best described as a ray of sunshine even on the cloudiest or dreariest days. No matter what daunting ailments or matters she was experiencing, she always managed to put on a smile and spread good feelings wherever she went. Therefore, as a youngster growing up Granny was always concerned about the people who influenced her childrens' lives and her granchildrens' lives

4 New Poems We added 4 new poems:"Dem Have!", "Obama's Cross", "Eternal Bonds" and "Scorching! by Margaret Juliet Bailey

Culture Shock: What Is For You - Part 4 by Aisha Scales This story tells the tale of Nadiya Foster, a Jamaican-born Canadian-bred university student who heads back to Jamaica for a one-year exchange program at UWI.

Immigration Lawyer or Liar…A Glimpse of the Past“ - Memoirs Of An Illegal Alien Part 77 When my father mentioned speaking to immigration Attorney Joel Cohen, I knew who he  was. He had a popular immigration Question and Answer show on the Caribbean radio station WAVS 1170 AM, every Tuesday evening.  He was always boasting about the clients he was able to assist to get their green card. He would give examples of cases where clients were accused of crimes or seem to have very little hope. He always seemed to find legal loop holes.

Ms. Dulcie Sey: "Caarbon Copy Images!" Greetings to hall hoff me fans dem in de nyame hof de Halmighty. Ow uno fearin dese unpredictable winter days? Well, thru me inna Jamaica, hit no so cole, but a night time it get kina cool, so me juss wrap hup inna wan shawl fe keep me warm where eva me go.

Live Broadcast: Usain Bolt And Belle Lubica: Reactions On The Streets Of Trelawny (Satire) Recently, a picture of Usain Bolt and Slovakian born fashion designer, Belle Lubica kissing, started  a wave of charged remarks on the web among Jamaicans both abroad and on the island. BoardlaneTV visited the small community of Sherwood Content in Trelawny where the record holding sprinter was born and raised to get reactions from the residents.  We now bring you the reactions to the story.

Granny Gheeta's Hurricane Anxiety for her Canine Loves In the wake of Hurricane Irene and all its devastation and inconveniences, I couldn't help thinking about Granny Gheeta and the hurricane anxiety she experienced when it came to her ever-loving pets.

LIVE BROADCAST: Prince Harry Visits Kingston Craft Market (Jamaican Sketch) BoardLane TV has learned that Prince Harry took time out to visit Kingston’s Craft market earlier today. We have footage of  Prince Harry’s visit to the market.  Harry, dressed casually in an open-necked blue linen shirt, navy blue trousers and blue suede boots, was seen with his entourage walking along the side-walk heading to the Craft market. He seems un-phased by the usual hustle and bustle of the Kingston streets. As he strides along, a bus conductor tries to get his attention:

Campus Life: What Is For You - Part 3 This story tells the tale of Nadiya Foster, a Jamaican-born Canadian-bred university student who heads back to Jamaica, the land of her birth, for a one-year exchange program at UWI. 

You're Getting Married Where...Really!!! - Memoirs Of An Illegal Alien Part 76 Uncle Teddy made a stopover in Miami on his way back to New York from Jamaica. He had spent a month in Jamaica. He now had a green card and had recently filed for my father. To him it was great news but to me it was a slight window of hope. It would take over 10 years before my father would get a green card. Then it would take another 7-10 years before I could get a green card through my father. I was not going to count on this as my way to a green card.

Granny Gheeta's Views on Feuding Families Every family has their share of sibling rivalries and feuds that keep the positive emotions of love, honor and respect at bay. Jamaican families are no different from other families around the world. As a matter of fact, Jamaicans as a whole, are more expressive and forthright about their emotions. Therefore, it isn't a surprise to find some family members at "odds" with each other due to the Caribbean nature of "telling it like it is".

An Old Friend?: What Is For You - Part 2 The car was parked nearby and it wasn’t long before we were driving down Palisadoes Road, along the strip of land that connected the Norman Manley International Airport to the rest of the island. Although I was concentrating on the conversation with my family, I just couldn’t keep my eyes on any of them. I was too busy looking out the windows. Every time that I came back to the island and was driving down Palisadoes, I felt like I had to devour everything I saw with my eyes, as if, if I didn’t, it might all disappear. As I talked about how school was going,

Ms. Dulcie Sey: "Marriage iz a joke today!"  Halloo all mi wandarful fans! Ow iz unu all doin? Well, Ms. Dulcie iz bizzy ringin in de New Year! Me an Missa Fowler a spen de New Year quiet, 'cause de yung peple dem get a bit rambunkcious dem ya dayz. So, me sen im go store ow much howas ago fi get sum hegg nog. Hall now mi still a wait fi im fi cum back, im mussey gawn to de fowl coop fi get de hegg dem fi mek de hegg nog.

The Drama Never Ends !!! - Memoirs Of An Illegal Alien Part 75 Sue was moving back to Jamaica. She made this decision when she came back from visiting Rosa in Orlando. She turned down Sidney’s marriage proposal.  It was a difficult decision because she would have gotten her green card, but she did not love him.

Granny Gheeta's Vision: Preview of Things To Come My Granny Gheeta was a woman of many talents, however, her most famous contribution to our family was her skillfulness of having visions. During her lifetime, Granny had visions on every subject under the sun. From going to the market, to  her female Grandchildren being in the "family way".

The Arrival - What Is For You : Part 1 We are please to announce a new serial "What is for You". This story tells the tale of Nadiya Foster, a Jamaican-born Canadian-bred university student who heads back to Jamaica, the land of her birth, for a one-year exchange program at UWI. During her year away from home, she reconnects with family, makes new friends, enters the St. Andrew social scene, and most importantly, falls in love. “What Is For You” is a love story, about Nadiya and the charming Jamaican medical student, Kevin Crawford, but it is even more so a love story about the island of Jamaica: her culture, her people, her beauty and her history. Topics touched upon include Rastafarianism, the arts in Jamaica, garrison politics, and classism and shadism.

Ms. Dulcie Sey: "Eva ere bout de Third Wurl Blonde?" Halloo mi precious fans! Ow hall uno folks doin? Me ope sey uno iz all halright. Well, de Halliday season iz halmost pon it way, an hevry badie feelin anxious 'cause de economy is at a standstill.  Lorks, mi dears, me no knoe wey fi tell huno, de Politician dem a skylark pon de job. Ongly God cyan elp we. One ting is good dough eh, in dese times peple need plenty counseling an dat's whey Ms. Dulcie come in. Praise God!

Christmas in Jamaica It Christmas time again and there is nothing like a Jamaica Christmas. Check out our recipes, articles, poems and music on Christmas in Jamaica.

This is Only a Love Test - Memoirs Of An Illegal Alien Part 73 The phone was ringing. I did not want to pick it up. I had just gotten into bed after a night of work and partying. I looked at the clock radio and it was 5:30 Am. I thought to myself, who would call this early in the morning? Who is actually up this early? The phone was on ring number 5, and at ring 7 it would go to the answering machine. I put the pillow over my head and waited.

Granny Ghetta Talks about The Birds & The Bees Old Fashioned Jamaicans are known for their British reserved manner and ambivalence to discuss certain private matters as if it were ordinary news. Therefore, most parents find themselves in a "pickle" when they have to discuss such subjects as Adolescence, Sexuality and Sex.

Twelve Days of Christmas Jamaican style It Christmas and you need a good Jamaican style Christmas carol.  Get into Christmas spirit with our version on Twelve Days of Christmas Jamaican style.  It includes many famous Jamaican foods.  We hope that you enjoy The 12 Days of Christmas Jamaican style.

Ms. Dulcie Sey: "A Wey Dem A Create Hexcitement Far?" Howdy Do to hall a mi fans dem....Me a sen praises an blessins to hall hof uno, hespecially afta de custed Irene carry hon like wan viraga....Lorks haff his mercy, what a sitiation do eh? Hanyhow mi glad sey hall a uno hallright. Praise Jesus sey fi me zinc roof still a heng pon it hinges!

Herman Cain and Gloria Cain Squabble - Jamaican Style (Satire) Imagine if Herman Cain was Jamaican and had to face a Jamaican wife after the last revelation of a long term affair. How would that conversation unfold? Well, I have the tape of the squabble between the two. This is an exclusive.

LIVE BROADCAST: Dancehall Star, Vybz Kartel escape (Satire) Reggae Dancehall star Vybz Kartel has been in police custody in Jamaica since October 1, while he awaits trail for two murder cases. This morning Boardlane TV received reports that the super star has escaped from his jail cell. The reports are that Kartel started a riot at the Horizon Adult Remand Centre in Jamaica early on Wednesday morning (November 30), and managed to escape with seven other inmates after holding officers at gunpoint. Boardlane TV is on location in an attempt to get to the bottom of this story.

A Parade of Stars of Jamaican Descent Jamaicans are known for their adventurous spirits and following their dreams wherever it takes them, therefore, it is no surprise to discover that there are celebrities who possess the best of both worlds with their foreign birth and Jamaican ancestry.  Here is a list of your favorite celebs who have proudly come from parents or grandparents who were born and raised in humble Jamaica.

Granny Gheeta and I Discuss Political Turmoil People say that Politics makes the world go round, however, in today's tumultuous political arena it is difficult for nations to find suitable leaders, who offer solutions to their governmental maladies. Granny and I often discussed the ills that plagued the world and one of the subjects we often talked about was Leadership. She felt that quality was lacking in today's Leaders because they always seemed self serving.