Ello dere mi fateful fans, ow iz hall hof uno dweyin hout dere inna de corrupted wul. Lorks hof mercy!

Mi tiad fi lissen to de news an ere hall of de treacharous tings peple is dweyin fi suvive.

Well, Ms. Dulcie haf nuff letta wey she get from de Postman. Me hole livin room nuh fill wid letta cyan dung. Me no knoe wen mi a go finish readin dese ere lettas.

Mi jussa go tek mi time an read dem wan by wan,

till mi ansa hevrybadie question dem.

So lissen me good........

Dear Ms. Dulcimer Robothom:

I am writing to you because I am so sick and tired of people having negative things to say about my children. My husband and I have lived all over the world, therefore our children have absorbed various different cultures, along with their Jamaican heritage.

However, although many people who know us and our family lives, we are still plagued with criticisms. People say our children don't act "Jamaican Enough", "They are too white" and "they don't partake in the culture enough".They say they are smart because they are Robots, objects from Mars...UFOS.

Ms. Dulcie my children have been exposed to Jamaican foods, theatre, customs and sayings all their life. They speak their own version of patois because they have lived in so many places that their dialects have been intermingled with other countries' accents. My husband I like to calltheir

accents "Internatois".

I must admit that I was raised inJamaica

with a European flair therefore some of the customs I have passed on to my children have been watered down. This is because my parents migrated to Jamaica fromFrance

. So, my children were raised Jamaican with a French flair as well. Instead of calling my husband and I Moma and Poppa, they call us Mammon and Pappah.

They were raised to be very prim and proper, yet regardless of their home training they are constantly criticized by others in ourCommunity

.Their smartness seems to upset a lot of people. My husband and I have been diligent with their Home-Schooling. We believe what you put out, you get back.

My youngest daughter Pascal has been teased that she is not Jamaican, and that she is faking her West Indian heritage. My eldest children are constantly berated for not acting Jamaican enough. It seems as if people expect them to eat ackee and saltfish all the time, and curse BC and RC just to fit in.

The truth is, although I have introduced my children to Caribbean foods, all three of them havefood allergies

. Therefore, it is diffucult for them to adhere to any particular diet. They eat foods that don't make them ill, regardless of the origin.

They have been introduced to all sorts of music, however after living in Asia, Europe, the UK andNorth America

, it is very difficult to get them to settle on any one type of music. My children prefer World Music, but they do loveJamaican

reggae as well. Some of theDance hall

songs, they are a little sketchy on, primarily because they don't understand some of the lyrics.

You see Ms. Dulcie, my husband is a British-Jamaican, and when I was growing up my parents did not allow me to speak patois at all. It is only now, that I have become an adult, that I find it necessary sometimes to use ceratin patois phrases to emphasize myself to folks who are being demeaning and quarrelsome.

My children are almost adults, and as a parent I would not change a thing about them. I am Human and my husband is a Human Being, therefore we did not bring Aliens into this world.

The snide remarks of others are very hurtful. They either think my kids are pretending to hide from their heritage or  that they are lying about their backgrounds.

They have suffered in a White World as well as theCaribbean Community

. Ms. Dulcie I would appreciate your input on this matter as soon as possible.

Sincerely,

Mother of Real "Phony" Children

Dear MRPC:

Dis is a fus wan fi me. Mi nevva knoe sey fi we hown peple cyan be so prejudice. Me hallways tink sey wance yu bawn a Jamaica peple hembrace yu. Himagine sey, Yu hown peple a do yu in like Jon Crow...Iz a blinkin shame.

Whatta sinting dough eh! Dem no undatand sey peple ar de sum of dere hexperiances. Hif yu liv a Mokko, yu a go hact like mokamanian. Halso, yu cyan be very hoity-toity an peple mess wid yu di wrang wey, an yu haffi traiten dem hout, and ge dem a dose hof de cunchie.

Me did knoe a lady name Ms. Pringles wey did live innaGermany

an cum a JA fi live. She sekkle an haff two pickney. Dose chilren spoke nuttin but German hall de time. Den wan day wan bwoy run hover wan hof de likle bwoy foot wid im bicycle pon Mountain View Road. Well, I nevva ere Ms. Pringles cuss Jamaican so bad inna mi life, heven de likkle bwoy was cussin in patois. Me nevva did knoe sey dem could speak henglish. Yu knoe, most peple who migrate to Jamaica become very versatile, dem cyan speakey-spokey wen dem haff to, an den dem cyan be as "rau-chau" wid hanybady if de mood cyall fe it.

Hafta de big debakkle pon Mountainview mi hask, de likle boy Sven, wey im learn patois like dat. You knoe wey im sey? "From de Helpa....."

Me juss laugh, cause me tink sey dat's where moss Jamaican pickney learn dem cuss phrases from. So me point iz dat, no mek peple tell yu har yu pickney ow fi hact.

When dem prim and propa dat's part hof dere eritage and wen dem go raga-muffin dat's anodder part hof dem eritage. Dem ya custed peple not lokin at de positive lesson.

Yu pickney dem iz Hinternational and versatile. Dem iz not no phony, baloney like de res a de almshouse dem who run rung like chalatans. Dem jussa wer all a dem rearin wid pride.

So hif dem wan sey "How about a spot of tea?" or "Pass me two hexcelsior crackers nuh!"

Peple shouldn't be too hasty to mek assumptions. Rememba, wen we assume we mek hediots houta weself.

 
In refrance to de pickney dem bein Haliens....Aren't we hall wen we lef owa cunchie? Dem is to fresh an wrenk!
 

Me ope sey me shed likkle light pon you situation. Tek cyare an tell de ole relux dem fi mine dem bizness!

Juss stomp hout de cucaracha dem from uno life...eh?

Wid Blessins

Dulcimer Peaches Robothom