Washing dishes was a part of my daily chore growing up. My grandparents didn’t have a lot of money but we got a lot of love. Lots of make shifting had happened and one of them is using a torn cloth from an old t-shirt to wash dishes. Hey, we made do with what we could afford.
Then here came the good old sponge. I was in such joy when I could use a sponge to wash dishes because it soaked up every ounce of soap making soap suds. This was my playground while washing dishes and I can remember my grandmother saying “stop wasting the water” because I would let the pipe run so I could play with the spongy soap sud.
Children are like sponges. They soak up everything, every word, every action they encounter. My wife and I got a shocker when our son Tyler was in his very early years. We were watching a movie we thought was free from cursing but was not. We ended up turning off the movie as we heard that first curse word. But before we could turn it off we heard the same curse word from Tyler’s mouth. It was like a high voltage shock running through Michelle and I as we steered at each other in dismay. How did Tyler even hear this from where he was, and how at that young age did he even know to repeat it. Then we remembered how spongy they are. They learn so much from our marriages. Here are some very important lessons they learn from your marriage.
Order And Priority
Chaos is a killer, even for married couples. Where there is no order there is no priority. When anything goes, everything goes. Love goes. Peace goes. Joy goes. Harmony goes out of the marriage. When cellphone use takes the place of time spent together, cellphone use takes the place of the time spent with children and teaches them to adopt the same chaos and disorder in their future marriage and family.
Spiritual Discipline
It is a fact that any married couple who set time to spend together praying and reading God’s word, reap a greater and more peaceful marriage relationship. A child seeing this will most likely learn and choose that same important discipline into their marriage and family.
Love In Action
Many say “I love you” but fail to show “I really love you.” There are many cases where parents tell their children they love them but do not show it much. I saw love more than I heard love growing up and it stuck with me like crazy glue and has driven me to really showing Michelle love. When a child hears the word love but does not see it, confusion develops in his mind and makes it hard for him to show love also.
Respect Shown To Each Other
As a child I could never speak out of place to any adult. That adult would scold me and then my grandparents would spank me. The heights of respect I saw my grands show to each other was beyond comprehension. It is only doing good for the children when they see a husband and wife being respectful in action and speech. To the contrary, it is a domino effect of disrespect from a child who only sees disrespect shown by husband to wife or wife to husband.
Conflict’s Reality
Your child will believe marriage will never have a moment of conflict when they never ever see husband and wife manage conflict. The key is how it is managed rather than avoiding it to think you are saving the child. It can be good for the child to see a bit of conflict handled with love and respect rather so they will know the reality of marriage relationships having conflict. A realistic issue handled well between husband and wife is much better than a false sense of life shown to a child by a husband and wife.
These are some key lessons to think about as husband and wife to teach to your children. They will need it as they grow into husbands and wives also. Parenting is not a science but there is a guide for great parenting found in the Bible. God created family and gave instructions for teaching children the way they should grow well. Enjoy your journey in marriage as you model the good life of marriage for your children. They will need it even more as they become husbands and wives also. Watch where you are walking because your children are following in your footsteps.
“TRAIN UP A CHILD IN THE WAY HE SHOULD GO AND WHEN HE GETS OLD HE WILL NEVER DEPART FROM HIM” Proverbs 22:6
About The Author
Carim Hyatt was born and raised partially in Jamaica, West Indies. He is one of seven children from the Hyatt family and has grown into a great man of God. Carim had the luxury of seeing his grandparents model a Christian family life while portraying a marriage in God’s image. Carim had his mother in his life also and learned a great deal about values and wisdom.
Carim’s passion is marriage and family. He and his wife Michelle, are hosts of MARRIAGE IN A MINUTE, a radio talk show reaching all over the world. He has authored two books, The importance of Salvation and Staying Married Becoming One Flesh. His journey has taken him from Insurance adjuster to minister through writing and public speaking. Carim leads men’s ministries, married couples lifegroups, praise and worship along with many other areas of ministry as God has led him. Carim and his beautiful wife Michelle have appeared on Television programs , namely TBN, speaking about marriage and family. He is a great motivator, mentor and loves the Lord with all his heart. His passion is to see every marriage go the long haul while being molded into God’s image
Join Carim on this great journey as He reaches the unsaved for Christ while continuing to encourage marriages and families.
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